HW 1

"There's nothing like that feeling of waiting for a guy. It's the lonliest feeling in the world. Holding that cell phone in your hand as you take out the trash, use the bathroom, change the litter box. Fearful that the one second you aren't looking will be when they call. Pathetic. And something I have done as recently as last week. What I do know now, and didn't know then, was that no relationship that makes you feel that insecure lasts. You aren't really waiting for a phone call; you're waiting for the other shoe to drop."

- from "My Boyfriend Wrote A Book About Me" by Hilary Winston

reading list

Books I'm currently reading:

"A Girl's Guide to Homelessness" by Brianna Karp

"Bossypants" by Tina Fey

AM two

Ally: "And this isn't about me wanting a man, either. This is about me wanting a partner, okay? A partner to go through life with. And since I happen to be heterosexual, that limits the field to men. At least if I want to have sex. And I do. I like sex! And if that makes me weak, tough, then I want to be weak. I want a partner. I want sex. I want a house with furniture. I want to have a baby. I want to have all of it. I want to get fat. I want to wear maternity dresses. I want to stick my legs up in stirrups, take two shots of Pitocin and spit the little thing right out between my thighs, and then have him suck on my breast with Daddy standing there the whole time pointing the camcorder, okay? That is what I want. And instead of sitting back hoping for it to happen, I'm gonna make it happen. You think you can deal with that?"

AM one

Tracy: "He's afraid of you. Why make that your problem? He's afraid."
Ally: "Why?"
Tracy: "He's interested."
Ally: "Men are supposed to pounce when they're interested. That's-"
Tracy: "Hello? They pounce on the wrong girls. When it's the right girl, they turn into bumbling little chickens."

reading list

Books I'm currently reading:

"Alphabet Juice: The Energies, Gists, and Spirits of Letters, Words, and Combinations Thereof; Their Roots, Bones, Innards, Piths, Pips, and Secret Parts, Tinctures, Tonics, and Essences; With Examples of Their Usage Foul and Savory" by Roy Blount Jr

"The Lost Girls: Three Friends. Four Continents. One Unconventional Detour Around the World" by Jennifer Baggett, Holly C. Corbett, and Amanda Pressner

"Booky Wook 2" by Russell Brand

sentience

Sentience is another word for consciousness, or the ability to be aware of oneself. For example, you know that you are a human. You know that you are separate from the world around you. When you think a thought or feel an emotion, you know that it only applies to you. You understand that the rest of the world does not change as your mind changes. You are aware that no one else feels or thinks the things you do. You are also aware that your thoughts and feelings come from inside you; they're not placed in your mind from an external source. You have a memory of your thought processes - you know that you didn't always think or feel the way you think or feel right now. And you know that you probably won't think or feel tomorrow the way you do right now. This self-awareness is one of the foundations of human intelligence. Without it, humans would be nonthinking brutes, unable to plan, or remember, or relate to other people.

- The Science of Battlestar Galactica by Di Justo and Grazier, page 32

starting point

For my birthday I asked my parents for a graduate school book that broke down programs by field and programs by state. I have key places I'm interested in moving to in order to attend grad school (Chicago, Boston, Denver, Kansas City, Los Angeles, New York) but I'm trying not to limit myself. I took a moment today and maneuvered my way through this book. I decided to approach this process by first circling the grad school fields of study I was interested in pursuing and learning more about. This is that list, narrowed down:

African Studies, Anthropology, Arts Administration, Art Therapy, Child Development, Corporate and Organizational Communication, Counselor Education, Cultural Studies, Demography and Population Studies, Educational Leadership and Administration, Ethnic Studies, Higher Education, Human Development, Humanities, Human Services, International Affairs, International Development, Liberal Studies, Nonprofit Management, Public Administration, Public Affairs, Public Policy, Religion, Social Psychology, Social Sciences, Social Sciences Education, Social Work, Sociology, Student Affairs, Therapies-Dance, Drama, and Music, Urban and Regional Planning, Urban Education, and Women's Studies

Granted I need to do further research on several of these fields but these are the grad school programs I'm interested in committing to in order to learn more about myself and the world. THIS is a starting point.